without music would be like shiverring and standing naked in snow and not knowing what the word “cold” is, progress, markers and expression.

love is something not to be distracted by.

dont fall off your path cause one day theyre gonna leave

but your feet will stick to the ground

weird dream

waking up after dreaming that i went back to my old job  of about a year ago that i got fired from, started working without telling anyone and then my boss says he wants me to work for him again so i laugh at him and walk off to my new job but first the barmaid i worked with turns round and tells my i have vertical scratches all down my body and i ought to go to the doctors cause its just appearing on my as im talking as if by magic

dreaming that im telling you about everything in my brain then waking up to find you asleep, you wouldnt be asleep if we were in a dream i dont think.. or would you?

dreaming that paints dripping down my walls 

dreaming that youre saying sorry and your brain is purging everything behind the bars

dreaming that youll do it again, and when you lose i will too

but now we’re waking and youre awake and im vertically striped in my eyes black and blue tears droplets rippling my eyeballs 

i had this idea for a photo and an idea for a song and ive forgotten them all

bugger

Gap year I cant wait for.

Look into starting a business/opening a shop

Practice two types of dance religiously.

Read up on both types of dance.

Look into circus training. 

Look at make up and music production courses.

Move out with Beth.

Find a part time/full time day job that fits in with current job. 

Go on holiday/visit my friend. 

Organize something special. :D 

Do a marathon. 

Do a charity event.

Go running with my dog every-morning. 

Get dad to do something romantic for my mum.

Take grandparents to Ireland. 

Make it such a good productive gap year that its not a gap year and I don’t have to give up and go to Uni. 

just when you think you’ve changed someone reminds you you’re still you,

i wonder how many different types of lonely there are like lonely old chatty men, lonely young reserved people, lonely women, lonely men, lonely children and animals, peas on a fork when youve eaten all their family..

rhyyyyyyyming wahaaa

id like to look inside

though youre wonderfully preserved 

for someone whos mother is so reserved

for someone whos father left and lied

for someone whos little brother is still so blind

for someone with the world on their back,

in a homemade tyedye havasack

So i wouldnt risk you for all the words 

all the worlds ive seen, written and heard

ive forgotten myself in your sound

——————————————————————

scars from the internal scratches of trying to get OUT

me from the future, the present and the passed OUT

lonelier to be alone or lonelier to lean with only means to an end…

put your faith in the fucked

mixing up stuff

cold late numb fuck it,  youre lonelier in your watering hole where you beg noone to go than you ever were on your rainy day alone, afflicted by the irony and no longer occupied by life, just finite resources un occupied by oxyen blardy blarh sleep sleep

find me in the bottom of my eyes, on the rooftop of wonderland,

ive lost the world on my way - they’re saying im intense,  but i dont care,

i’m looking through a different lense

let me express this, your gonna watch me flicker and youll learn to love this